#Better Late Than Never 11

Hey guys,

I’m SO sorry that I haven’t posted in a while. I’ve been super busy and stuff. So I graduated college, thank goodness, that’s finally over 😀 I passed everything and received some merits, i’m super happy to be honest. I’m going to sew a long sleeved top soon, probably this winter haha

I want to set up a business, make music videos and live a happy, fulfilling life.

Oh yeah, guys, guess what bad news I have…I’ve been having what’s called intrusive thoughts, I bleeping HATE them, they’re evil, evil I tell you. They make me have these thoughts and voices, telling me to do horrible things to my family. I swear I HATE them with all my might. I want them gone. Anyone know a cure? Please inform me xoxoxoxo

Peace Out Ninjas xoxoxoxo

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Fluoxetine (Prozac) Diaries #1

Hey guys!

So, my p dr prescribed me 10mg of fluoxetine. I’ve been taking it roughly one month now. I was prescribed it for anxiety, OCD and mood, however i’m not seeing much improvement…

My first few nights on fluoexitine were….hmmm…a little different, I was wide awake all night and the early hours of the morning, I mean i’m usually always awake late anyway, however this time, I actually WANTED to go to sleep and done everything possible to make the daunting process happen. It just took it’s jolly sweet time!

I had the most awkward ‘review’ appointment with my GP as well, it was really weird, a few days ago my family had went to the clinic, he had asked how I am and stated he wants to see me…SO my amazing family members/main carer had arranged an appointment. Not only did I have no genuine idea what the Dr may have wanted BUT I had arrived an hour earlier…while waiting to see the GP, I had noticed one of my ‘shadow’ people, which I hadn’t known to be a hallucination, until I was told that not everyone sees them…which I had believed to be the case for many years *face palm*. 

An hour passes by and I see the GP, he asks what I’ve came to see him for, I reply…I don’t know…it remains awkwardly silent for more than 10 seconds…he eventually then says, no idea at all?, I reply…well, you said you wanted to see me the other day. This rather bamboozled Dr, returns from his sudden amnesia and says oh yea! how are things…you look a lot better than the last time I seen you, less fidgety. I reply yea, I currently take fluoxetine and I’m going to begin Risperidone soon, he tells me how important it is to take my meds, I agree and return home. 

All that waiting for awkwardness aye! LOL

 

#Better Late Than Never 5

Hey guys! How are you all doing?

I had a great weekend, yesterday I went on a LONG adventure to many shops and parks with a dear friend of mine. Oh, let’s not forget my corner Muller yoghurts, oh I LOVE them. I still have one more left, woop, woop!

But guess what!?!?! I’ve finished this year of college, I have a whole 10 weeks off, but i’ll be back next year probably to graduate, unless of course I get a damn good job before next semester haha. #Excited

Ugh, I’ve now accepted that I have OCD as well as social anxiety disorder, I wonder when I first got OCD and why I did?!?! Some of my symptoms are the middle, I have to be in the middle, sat in the middle, stood in the middle or walking on the inside of the pavement (The side that isn’t next to the road/curb), everything I pick up in a shop has to be from the middle, this can annoy people when I shop with them, especially food shopping with family or friends, it just has to be from the middle or the CLOSEST to a middle, if there is no middle. I usually do things small things like take something out of the fridge, wash my hands or whatever it is i’m doing has to be a certain amount of numbers (the numbers ALWAYS change throughout the day) if I don’t do it that amount of times, then something bad will happen to me or someone that I love/care about, usually death or contracting an illness, or something going wrong and it would all be my fault because I didn’t do it a set amount of times, there are rarely some happy thoughts like if i do something x amount of times then such and such a person will come to visit in the next 30mins or something like that (if they’ve said they are coming that day). It’s strange, I tell you! Every night before I sleep I need to shake my blankets and dust off my sheets before I can get into the bed, otherwise there’d be a spider or dots or something bad inside my bed, i’ve never, ever found a spider or anything like that in my bed before, but if I don’t do that, then my brain tells me that there will be one. I get many intrusive negative thoughts throughout the day as well, I don’t seem to dream often either.

Hmmm, well, I thought I’d just give you all an update of me and tell you of my new findings haha. In case you are wondering I haven’t been officially diagnosed with OCD and believe me, I don’t need to either, I didn’t list the rest of my OCD tendencies, but there’s more. Beyond a shadow of a doubt. 

So tell me about what you’ve done lately? Oh and feel free to offer advice and share your experiences via comments down below.

Peace Out

– ‘Better Late Than Never’ :) xoxo